As one year ends and another begins, it's natural to imagine what we want for the future. But we know how the story usually ends: By February, most New Year's resolutions have been abandoned, leaving us discouraged and wondering why we even bothered.

That's no way to start something new! As a psychotherapist with over 20 years of experience, I can tell you that the problem is in our approach. Resolutions tend to be vague, unrealistic, and disconnected from our deeper values, failing to create the emotional commitment needed for real change. 

This year, instead of making resolutions, try something different — manifest the changes you want to make in your life with simple, practical steps. 

Manifesting is more than wishful thinking

"Manifesting" might get as much side-eye as "resolutions," but this isn't about making a wish and waiting for the universe to deliver. It's a deliberate process that involves aligning your values, intentions, and actions to move toward the life you want. 

Here are some practical tips to help shift from ineffective resolutions to meaningful manifesting any time of year.

1. Set intentions that align with your values

Resolutions often focus on superficial outcomes, like "lose 10 pounds" or "save $5,000." While these goals might sound productive, they lack emotional depth. Manifesting starts by identifying your core values.

Ask yourself: What do I truly care about? Why do I want this change? 

If your value is health, for example, your intention might be to nurture your body through balanced nutrition and movement that feels good. From there, create goals that are S.M.A.R.T. — specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound — like "I will take a 30-minute walk three times a week."

2. Focus on subtracting as much as adding

Our culture glorifies "the grind," often equating our value as humans with how much we achieve and what we sacrifice to get there. Resolutions tend to pile onto our already busy lives, creating pressure rather than relief. 

Instead of adding to your long to-do list, try making a let-go list. Identify habits, thoughts, or commitments that no longer serve you. Maybe you need to stop saying "yes" to everything or beating yourself up over perceived failures.

Letting go clears space for you to focus your energy on what truly matters.

3. Create a vision that inspires

Create a vivid picture of what you desire. Take time to journal, visualize, or even create a vision board that reflects your values and intentions. By keeping your vision front and center, you reinforce your emotional connection to the changes you want to make.

4. Celebrate progress, not perfection

Resolutions often set a fixed destination, like "run a marathon" or "pay off debt." But rigidly focusing on outcomes can lead to all-or-nothing thinking — a distorted mindset in which falling short feels like failure. For instance, if you planned to save $500 but only managed $400, you might see the entire effort as a waste.

Instead, ask yourself: What can I do today that aligns with my intentions? This approach builds momentum while allowing flexibility, helping you stay committed even if plans evolve.

Break your goals into small, manageable tasks and celebrate each step forward. If your intention is to cultivate mindfulness, a single five-minute meditation is a win worth acknowledging. Small victories build confidence and keep motivation alive.

5. Lead with love, not judgment

Approach your journey from a place of self-compassion and empathy rather than harsh criticism. Research shows that treating yourself with kindness fosters resilience, motivation, and lasting change far more effectively than judgment or self-criticism. 

'You don't need a perfect plan'

Manifesting works because it taps into what's meaningful to you, engages your emotions, and focuses on actions that are both intentional and achievable.

Unlike resolutions, which often feel like self-imposed rules, manifesting should feel empowering. You're not restricting, you're creating — making progress toward a life that feels authentic and fulfilling.

This shift in perspective can transform the way you approach not just the New Year but any goal you set. You don't need a perfect plan, and you certainly don't need the clock to strike midnight on January 1 to get started.

All you need is a clear intention, a connection to your values, and a commitment to taking one step at a time. 

Chamin Ajjan, LCSW, A-CBT, CST is the CEO and Clinical Director of Chamin Ajjan Psychotherapy, a regional clinic of the National Social Anxiety Center where she is also a board member. She completed her undergraduate work at the University of California, Berkeley, and graduate school at Columbia University School of Social Work. She is also the author of "Seeking Soulmate: Ditch The Dating Game and Find Real Connection″ and an expert instructor in CNBC Make It's online course Become an Effective Communicator: Master Public Speaking.

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